We encourage you to use both your mind and your heart
to re-evaluate what mainstream American culture
has been teaching us about infant-rearing.
Make informed parenting decisions that feel right.
If we adults feel sad or lonely, we sometimes "soothe" ourselves by listening to music or watching TV, but most of us would prefer to pick up the phone and call someone, or get in our cars and go to where our loved ones are, or at least to a place where we can be with other human beings. We don't "suffer in silence;" we take action. But what choice do babies have? They're entirely dependent on us. They cry to let us know they need us, but “experts” have told us we need to ignore them, that they need to learn to "self-soothe." Research has shown that children can't BEGIN to learn to soothe themselves till they're about 2 and a half to 3 years old. And anyway, if we adults turn to others for comfort, even though we have the maturity and ability to have developed many coping mechanisms, why do we deny comfort to our very dependent and immature babies?
How is CARE Parenting different from regular parenting?
Mainstream or “regular” parenting in the U.S. has mainly concerned itself with shaping, controlling and modifying children’s behavior and has given little importance to children’s emotional and relationship needs.
Parents who practice CARE Parenting believe in meeting their children’s needs for emotional security and for empathetic, responsive caregivers. They believe in “tuning in” to their children to try to understand what they’re feeling and trying to communicate. They listen with empathy and make thoughtful, conscious decisions, rather than just “doing what’s always been done” or reacting based on whatever mood they happen to be in. They respond to in a positive and caring way that shows respect for their children and their feelings, thoughts, preferences and boundaries.
Let’s revisit these beliefs. Let’s try to really understand what the baby in this one-minute video is feeling.